theartsofdemocracy.


active listening.
May 12, 2006, 7:20 am
Filed under: active listening

I've been exercising my brain, along with my mouth & ears head, shoulders, knees & toes for a while with my mother.

I guess it started because I've grown more and more comfortable with Mama Rose as I've matured. Well, honestly, I always have been. However, I am more honest with her–in terms of how I feel about situations, and everything that goes on between my friends and I. I have even clued Papa Rose into the sort of relationship that my mother and I share, which he sees as a gift.

But anyways, I am usually selfish–even in the way I talk. I often rant about the current issues and problems–the current wrongs in Lana's life so that the parents (the two people who listen best) can understand my situation and feed me their sympathy in sugarcoated comfort.

I recently started to change up the ratio of the amount I rant, to the amount in which they rant, so that they rant more than I rant… if that makes sense. Basically, I listened to what wisdom they can bring to the table, along with their problems, and talk to them about such things.

My mother, whether due to her age or what not, seems to become more and more neurotic at times. But I love her for it. I love crazy people, I do. Especially crazy moms, those are the best. But back to the point, Mama Rose seems to get "irked" at more and more things–and somewhat paranoid as well. I suppose I provide somewhat of a low-cost (more like free) therapeutic service at home for her. I talk through things with her, but most importantly, I listen to her.

My mom has been really stressed lately with her jobs and whatnot. She's a nurse practitioner for the military hospital in Blah-city. She spends her days listening to all the soldiers' stories (soldiers from Iraq), so I suppose it's nice to have somebody who cares for her that listens to her problems, instead of listening to theirs.

My dad also has a similar profession, being a child psychiatrist. It shocked me a few weeks ago when he confided many of his current issues in me, and looked to me for advice.

Anyways… I think I strayed from the topic of active listening quite a bit, but here's the jist. I exercised active listening with the folks!!!!

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AOD:activelistening. inclassnotes.
April 8, 2006, 9:15 am
Filed under: active listening

Non-verbal

  • +focusing on speaker
  • +nodding
  • +shaking head
  • +requires patience
  • +eye contact
  • +facial expressions
  • +not distracted/distracting

Reflective listening

  • +Empathy
  • +Validate emotions
  • +"I" statements

Get to the deeper meaning

  • +Participate in conservation
  • +Restate what person is trying to say (Help them speak out their thoughts and emotions)
    • +Questions

Three things I learned:

  • +Difficult to maintain conversation w/out active listening
  • +Easier to understand/sympathize with the situation if you can relate
  • +You have to be reciprocate each other's ideas to fully comprehend